​What is sexual orientation?

Sexual orientation is about who someone is sexually, romantically, or emotionally attracted to or not attracted to. Everyone has a sexual orientation.

Sexual orientation is part of a person’s identity. Sometimes sexual orientation and sexual behaviours match. Sometimes they don’t. Sexual orientation may be the same through someone’s life or it may change.​

What are some words to know?

When learning about words related to sexual orientation, it’s important to remember:​

• Sexual orientation is about a personal identity, not a label put on someone else.
• Words may mean different things to different people.
• Language changes over time. Words that were commonly used in the past may be seen as hurtful today.

There are many different sexual orientations. Some common words for sexual orientations are:

• Asexual (Ace)—no or little sexual attraction or desire to have sex, and may or may not have romantic or emotional attraction.
• Bisexual (Bi)—attraction to people of the same and other genders. It often means attraction to both men and women. In the same way that people who identify as straight aren’t attracted to everyone of the opposite sex, people who identify as bisexual aren’t attracted to everyone of every sex or gender.
• Gay—attraction to people of the same sex or gender. It’s often used for a man attracted to men. Unless you use it to describe your own identity, avoid using the word “homosexual,” because it’s often been used in hurtful ways.
• Lesbian—a woman who’s attracted to women. 
• Pansexual (Pan)—attraction to people of any sex or gender. In the same way that people who identify as straight aren’t attracted to everyone of the opposite sex, people who identify as pansexual aren’t attracted to everyone of every sex or gender.
• Straight (heterosexual)—attraction to people of the opposite sex or gender.
• 2SLGBTQI+—This is a short way to talk about the community of people who identify as an identity that is not cisgender and not straight.
  

Some of the letters stand for sexual orientations (lesbian, gay, bisexual), and some stand for gender identities (2S, transgender).

The “Q” for queer stands for both sexual orientation and gender identity. It also stands for questioning as people figure out their identity.

The “I” stands for intersex which is when someone’s reproductive biology doesn’t fit within the traditional idea of male or female body or genetics.

The “+” stands for all identities not otherwise included.

People may use other words to describe their sexual orientation. If someone identifies themself using a word you don’t know, you can ask them what it means.

What can I do?

• Treat everyone with respect. 
• Use language that includes people no matter what their sexual orientation might be.
• Don’t say hurtful things about or to others.
• Don’t discriminate against others.
• Understand that someone else’s sexual orientation isn’t about you.
  

If someone you care about has told you about their sexual orientation, you can:

• Say thank you for letting you know.
• Keep showing and saying you care.
• Remember that they’re the same person they were before you knew this.
• Avoid trying to change their sexual orientation.
• Get more information and support from organizations like PFLAG Canada.

If you are 2SLGBTQI+ or are learning about your own sexual orientation, it can be helpful to talk with someone you trust who is 2SLGBTQI+ friendly.

If you’re not sure where to start, think about connecting with: