Overview

Stillbirth is the loss of a baby after 20 weeks of pregnancy. When a baby dies while still in the uterus, this may also be called fetal loss.

A doctor may deliver the baby by giving you medicine to start labour. Or you may have a procedure called D&E (dilation and evacuation).

The loss of a baby can be hard. And you may wonder why it happened. Fetal loss can happen even during a pregnancy that has been going well.

In the weeks to come, try to take care of yourself physically and emotionally. Take care of yourself in whatever way feels best.

What happens next?

After a fetus dies, labour will usually begin on its own within 2 weeks. But if you don't want to wait that long, you can choose to have labour induced. This means going to the hospital and, usually, getting medicine that starts the labour process.

If labour doesn't start on its own, your doctor or midwife may take steps to get your labour going.

• Your doctor or midwife may use medicine to soften your cervix and help it begin to open.
• Then your doctor or midwife will likely give you medicine to start labour and keep your labour going.
• You will be given medicine for pain if you need it.

After delivery, you will be able to see the baby if you want to. Although this can be hard, some people want the chance to hold the baby and say goodbye. Hospitals may have trained staff to help support you.

You will probably go home the next day.

Options instead of labour

You may be able to choose a procedure called a dilation and evacuation (D&E) instead of going through labour. Your doctor or midwife will discuss whether this is an option for you.

Delivery by caesarean section is rare in fetal loss. It is major surgery, so it's only done when going through labour would be more dangerous.

Deciding about autopsy

If the exact cause of death isn't known, you may face a decision about whether to have an autopsy. This can be a hard decision. But an autopsy may help you find out why a fetal loss happened and whether it could happen again. If you have had multiple fetal losses in a row, your doctor or midwife may suggest testing to check for other possible causes.

How can you care for yourself at home?

After a stillbirth, there are things you can do for your physical and emotional health and comfort.

Taking care of your body

• You may have some bleeding. Use pads instead of tampons.
• Ask your doctor or midwife if you can take an over-the-counter pain medicine, such as acetaminophen (Tylenol), ibuprofen (Advil, Motrin), or naproxen (Aleve), to ease cramps. Be safe with medicines. Read and follow all instructions on the label.
• Ask your doctor or midwife about when it is okay to have sex.

Taking care of your emotional health

• Rest whenever you can. Being tired can make it harder to cope with your emotions.
• Try to eat healthy foods, get some sleep, and get exercise (or just get outside) while you heal.
• Tell your family and friends what they can do. You may want to spend time alone, or you may seek support from family, friends, or religious or spiritual groups.
• Talk to your doctor or midwife about how you are coping. Your doctor or midwife will want to watch you for signs of depression. You may want to have counselling for support and to help you express your feelings.
• Think about making a memory book of your pregnancy and baby. You may choose to name your baby and want to take pictures and keep a lock of hair. Ask the hospital what they can offer to support you.
• Some people have a ceremony, such as a christening or other blessing or a memorial service. Pregnancy and Infant Loss Programs in Alberta provide memorial services:
  • Calgary Zone provides a Service of Remembrance twice a year. Call 403-944-4460 to register.
  • Edmonton Zone provides Remembering Our Losses memorial event. Call 780-735-4506 or go to www.parent-care.ca/parentcare-events-memorial-events/ to learn more.
• If you can, try to talk to others who have gone through this loss. You can make connections online or in person. Ask your hospital to recommend local programs or organizations that can help support you and your family. Here are some organizations that can help:
  • AHS Pregnancy and Infant Loss Program. This program provides support for parents who have experienced the loss of a pregnancy or baby. Call 403-944-2274 in Calgary Zone or 403-309-2896 in Central Zone (Red Deer).
  • AHS Perinatal Bereavement Program. This program provides support for families who have experienced the loss of a pregnancy or baby.
    Edmonton Zone: 780-735-4506.
  • H.E.A.R.T.S. (Helping Empty Arms Recover through Sharing). This program is open to all families in Alberta affected by the loss of a baby. Go to www.heartsbabyloss.com for more information.
  • Caring Beyond. This group offers in-person peer support to parents who have lost a baby (Calgary Zone). Go to www.facebook.com/CaringBeyond for more information.
  • The Compassionate Friends of Canada. This is a resource for people who have lost a child. The group can help put you in touch with one of its support groups in your area. Go to http://tcfcanada.net for more information.
• Watch the video series: A parent’s view of pregnancy and infant loss. These videos show the different experiences of many families going through loss. Families share stories about the time of their loss, personal grief journeys, and the challenges and decisions they faced. They have shared their stories to help others navigate this difficult time.