When a pregnancy ends in a loss, you and your partner may go through a wide range of feelings and emotions. Some parents may accept the loss of their baby as another life experience they have to deal with and move on. For others, the loss can be overwhelming and it takes longer. These reactions are very individual. There is no right or wrong way to feel.
The feeling of connection you had with your baby during the pregnancy will impact how you feel after your loss. It helps to acknowledge your sadness and disappointment. Allow yourself the time and space to grieve, and to feel emotional pain. Healing from loss is a process. It takes time and effort to heal.
Sometimes it can be hard to find the right words when you try to talk about your loss. You may wish to write out your thoughts and share this with your partner. Or you may want to write a letter to your baby about how you feel and what you had wished for them. This can help create a special memory or keepsake about your baby.
If you're blaming yourself for what happened, remember there is nothing you did to cause the loss of your baby. Your lifestyle, diet, or sexual activity are not responsible for the loss of your baby. There are many unknowns in a stillbirth and often there is no answer to the question of “why".
The loss of a baby is often considered as one of the most difficult losses a person can experience. Many parents have said that taking time to say goodbye in a meaningful way helped them at the time of loss, and later, through the grief process.